For Women Who Want True Progress in the New Year (and Year-Round)
By the time we reach the mid-life stage, most of us know what doesn’t work: rigid new year resolutions, all-or-nothing plans, and goals that look good on paper but don’t fit real life.
A more effective approach to the New Year focuses on who you’re becoming, how you support yourself daily, and focusing on the process rather than chasing outcomes.
Here’s a practical framework to help you approach the new year with clarity, consistency, and positive momentum.
1. Start with “I am” statements, not “I will” goals
“I will” goals focus on behavior and outcomes.
“I am” statements focus on identity.
Identity shapes behavior far more effectively than willpower.
Examples:
- I am someone who takes care of myself consistently.
- I am someone who consistently spreads kindness to the world.
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I am someone who values quality over excess.
Once identity is clear and continually reinforced or stated (like during daily affirmations!), actions follow naturally. You don’t have to force discipline; you simply act in alignment with who you’ve decided you are.
Practical step:
Write 3 “I am” statements you want to live into this year that reflect your core values. Keep them realistic and supportive, not aspirational or critical.
2. Anchor your statements in daily processes
Outcomes fluctuate, and you often don't have 100% control over them. Processes carry you forward, and they are something you can control.
Instead of focusing on results (more energy, less stress, clearer skin), focus on the daily actions that support those outcomes.
For example:
-
I am someone who takes care of myself consistently.
- Process: Daily movement of 20-30 minutes
-
I am someone who consistently spreads kindness to the world.
- Process: Write a kind note or send a kind text message to someone in my life each day.
-
I am someone who values connection and friendship.
- Process: Go to lunch 1x per week with a friend or family member
When you commit to the process, progress takes care of itself.
Practical step:
For each “I am” goal, write 1-2 small daily processes that support it.
3. Keep goals seasonally realistic
You know your seasons... Are certain times of the year busier for you? Harder to get outside?
Design your processes so they feel doable on your busiest or lowest-energy days. If a routine only works when life is perfect, it won’t last. Adjust your processes over time as needed. Remember, it's not the outcome you are focused on, it's the process of "becoming".
Practical step:
Ask yourself: Would I still do this on a hard, busy day or week?
If the answer is no, simplify and adjust.
4. Use reflection instead of judgment
Reflection builds awareness. Judgment shuts it down.
Rather than asking “Did I succeed?”, ask:
- What worked this week?
- What felt supportive?
- What felt draining?
This information helps you observe, maybe adjust, and never quit.
Practical step:
Once a week, write 3 short reflections. No analysis. Just observation.
5. Pair reflection with gratitude
Gratitude grounds progress.
It shifts focus from what’s missing to what’s already working and supporting your process.
Practical step:
End each day (or week) by writing:
- Things you’re grateful for in your life
- One small thing (or person) that supported your efforts
This reinforces the identity you’re building.
6. Create non-negotiable forms of care
Non-negotiables are the things you return to even when motivation fades. With all progress in life, there needs to be self-care involved.
These don't need to be ambitious. Something you can also rely on.
Examples:
- Cleansing and moisturizing every night
- A short evening wind-down ritual (maybe chamomile tea and reading a book for 15 minutes)
- A walk outside every day
These small acts reinforce consistency and self-trust.
7. Think about alignment, not perfection
Progress isn’t linear. We all have ups and downs, ebbs and flows. The process is often messy and hard and needs fluidity.
Instead of asking “Did I stick to the plan?”, ask:
- What have I learned this week?
- How does this help me with who I am?
- Are my daily processes still supporting the beautiful person I am?
A final thought
At this stage of life, real change comes from systems, not willpower.
“I am” statements, supported by simple processes, reflection, and gratitude, create momentum that feels sustainable and lasting.
As you step into the new year, we wish you the confidence to love yourself, those around you, and live in alignment with who you truly are.
